It’s no secret that there are women who prefer to date older men.
Some of the reasons may include a more stable income, reliability and maturity, and more experience in relationships and life in general.
It’s true that older men usually have more experience and maturity, but that doesn’t mean they’re any better at relationships than younger men.
You’ve probably heard the phrase, “age is just a number.”
You see, just because someone is older than you doesn’t mean they’re going to be a good fit for you.
Dating an older man?
Make sure you’re on the lookout for these red flags:
10 Red Flags To Watch Out For When Dating an Older Man
1 He doesn’t respect your boundaries
Why is this important?
Well, a man who doesn’t respect your boundaries will most likely disrespect other aspects of your life.
He may constantly try to control you or manipulate you into doing things that you don’t want to do.
He might also try to change your behavior and make you behave in ways that he thinks are appropriate for a woman or partner in general.
This could include forcing you to dress differently than usual or act differently than usual around his friends and family members.
This kind of controlling behavior is a red flag because it shows that he doesn’t trust you enough to make decisions on your own.
Older men may have been in relationships before you and know what they’re doing, but they can also be set in their ways — especially if they’ve been with the same woman for years.
If you’re a young woman in a new relationship with an older man and he starts making comments about how “you need to learn how to do things” or tells you what’s “best” for you, be wary.
You don’t need someone who’s going to treat you like a child in your own relationship.
That said, if he does respect your boundaries and wants you to feel comfortable enough to make decisions about your life without him interfering, then this is a good sign that he’ll treat you well.
2 He has a track record of dating younger women
If you’re looking to date a man who is much older than you, it’s important to take notice of his past relationships.
If he has a history of dating younger women, it’s something you need to consider when taking things further.
There are many reasons why this could be a red flag.
For starters, it might mean that he’s not mature enough for a relationship with someone his own age.
It might also mean that he doesn’t respect women of his own age group and sees them as inferior or not worth his time.
The sooner you can learn about these patterns, the better off you’ll be in your relationship with him.
3 He’s not interested in your career or future goals
You deserve someone who will support and encourage you to reach your goals.
This is especially important if you want a long-term relationship with him.
An older man who wants to be with you should also care about where your career is headed, especially if he’s already established in his career.
He has probably made all the money he needs for the rest of his life.
A man who isn’t interested in your goals might try to change them, even subtly, so that they align with his instead.
This can be dangerous because it will make you feel as if you have no control over your own life choices.
If you’re talking about your dreams and goals, and he is only interested in what you’re wearing and how you look, that is a sign that he has no real interest in who you are as a person.
4 He doesn’t want to introduce you to his friends or family members (or vice versa)
If he doesn’t want anyone else to know about you because “they won’t understand,” it is another major red flag.
If someone doesn’t want to introduce you, it usually means they’re hiding something.
If he isn’t willing to put himself out there and let you meet people who are important in his life, it makes you wonder what he’s hiding.
Maybe he doesn’t want them to know about you because they might disapprove of him dating someone younger than him (if that’s the case).
Couples share their lives with each other — even if they have separate lives outside their relationship.
If he isn’t willing to share his world with the woman he loves, you should reconsider whether or not he genuinely cares about you at all.
5 He doesn’t want children or isn’t sure about having them
If children are important to you, and he doesn’t want them or is unsure, that might be a problem.
The reason it’s a red flag is because having kids is one of the most important things in life.
You may think that he’ll change his mind after getting to know you better, but it rarely happens like that.
If he doesn’t want kids now and has no plans to have them in the future, it will always be a source of tension between the two of you.
Not wanting kids at all isn’t necessarily a deal breaker, but you both have to be on the same page and reach a final understanding about it.
6 He doesn’t treat you like he would a girlfriend his age but rather like a trophy
Older guys often have a certain cachet that comes with being older.
They’re seen as more mature and more experienced — which is one reason why they might be attracted to younger girls.
But many times, their desire to be seen as more mature and experienced means they’ll treat their girlfriends like they’re trophies they can show off to their friends and family members by parading them around like arm candy.
It’s normal for an older man to feel proud of having a young girlfriend.
But when it comes at the expense of treating you like an object instead of as an equal partner in the relationship, reevaluate whether it is really what you want out of life.
This is a problem because it suggests that your feelings don’t matter as much as his own ego does.
7 He won’t try new things with you
This means that he’s most likely not willing to grow as a person or even try to see things from another point of view if it means stepping outside his comfort zone.
An older man who won’t try new things with you is likely insecure in his own skin and has trouble dealing with change or new experiences.
If he’s over 40, chances are he’s stuck in his ways.
He doesn’t want to try anything new because he’s been doing the same thing for 20 or 30 years.
Does he insist on doing things his way every time, whether in simple things such as watching movies or ordering food or big issues such as moving in together, getting married, or having kids?
He also might not be interested in exploring new places or trying new things with you because he wants to keep things exactly the same.
Older men are generally set in their ways and don’t like change.
A healthy relationship requires compromise from both partners to make both people happy with their lives together.
8 He acts like he knows everything
This is one you should definitely pay attention to.
When you’re dating an older man, remember that he’s not all-knowing.
If he constantly tries to teach you things or push his opinions on you, it’s a red flag.
This type of behavior often stems from insecurity and communicates that he needs to feel superior in order to be happy.
It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that because someone is older than you, they’re automatically more mature, but this isn’t always the case.
In fact, some men who date younger women are actually very immature in their relationships with them.
This behavior can make it difficult for you to feel like your opinions matter and are worth listening to — which is something every woman needs from her partner.
So if he acts like he knows everything better than you do, you will never do anything right in his eyes.
9 He makes comments about how much younger you are than him
It means he’s not mature enough to handle the age difference.
It is usually a sign that he’s not interested in a serious relationship with you but wants to use your youth to his advantage.
He’s always telling stories about when he was young or how different things used to be back then.
10 He’s married
If he’s married, it means he’s cheating on his wife with you.
He’s just out for some fun before he goes back home to his wife.
Another red flag is if he’s been married more than once (or twice or three times).
The more marriages someone has been in, the harder it is for them to commit to one person.
Or he talks about marriage too soon — meaning within the first few months of dating.
He might say things like, “I’ve never wanted to be married before, but now I do,” or “We should get engaged soon.”
While some people marry quickly because they know from the start that they’re meant for each other, most people take time getting to know each other before making such big commitments.
Dating an older man might be a great way to experience a more mature relationship.
It could mean more life experience, less drama, and fewer bad breakups.
But watch out for these red flags that can tell you whether or not he’s worth the effort.
