Marriage is very beautiful when both parties are head over heels in love or at least committed to mutual love and respect.
However, what happens when the love turns sour, and one party sees the other as an irritation?
This is a not-so-pretty thought, but how can you even identify the telltale signs that your husband is now disgusted by you?
Here are signs to look out for:
8 SIGNS YOUR HUSBAND IS DISGUSTED BY YOU
1. He Will Become Irritable and Allergic to your Presence
Similar to how lactose intolerant people react to milk, he will start to react negatively to your presence, and your company becomes his least favorite place.
He may become averse to sharing the same space with you and would rather hang out with his friends than spend time with you.
He may desperately avoid making public appearances with you and stay out as late as he can; he may even move out of the room or house.
The days of curling up together and having humorous conversations may gradually become a memory as the very sound of your voice becomes an irritant to him.
Whereas a spouse in love will light up at the sight of their lover, a disgusted husband will be upset when you walk in and will do anything to leave the place.
He could be having a wonderful day until you walk into the room or talk to him.
He will become sensitive to every conversation you try to have with him, and the slightest thing will get him on the edge while you are left wondering what you did or said to trigger him.
2. Intimate Activities Will Be Grounded
A husband who is disgusted by his wife will be the least bit attracted to her sexually.
He will not touch, hug, kiss, or even have sex with you, and even when you initiate intimacy, he will snub you.
He will not make an effort to be intimate with you, and neither will he find your body attractive any longer.
Public displays of affection will also be grounded.
3. He May Become Passively Aggressive
The temperament of men differ, and while some are very expressive, others might mask their feelings and instead start exhibiting passive-aggressive behaviors.
He will gaslight you and manipulate you with his actions.
He may not use his words to tell you how strongly he feels about you, but his actions will express it.
4. He Will Become a Nonchalant Partner
A loving arm and shoulder are what many people desire, and a supportive partner is priceless, but when your husband is disgusted by you, he will withdraw all support.
He will show no visible interest in working out the relationship.
He will not care about what is going on in your life, and he will also refuse to regard your dreams and efforts.
Even when you try to carry him along, he will give curt and mean responses.
He will never see any value in you or in what you do.
He will forget or disregard your special days like birthdays, wedding anniversaries, and even family functions you hold dear to heart.
He will not be excited about your growth and success, nor does he care.
He will live as if you don’t exist.
5. He Will Be on a Fault-Finding Spree and Openly Disrespect You
This comes with a lot of complaining and nagging.
Nothing you do will ever sit right with him.
He may even be rude and critical and embarrass you in public.
Men love to speak boastfully about the women they love, but in this case, he will not speak well of you before his family and friends, and neither will he defend you when the situation calls for it.
He will rather become your worst critique.
He might even put you down in public conversations because he finds no value in you.
Every effort you make to be loving to him will be deflected by him.
He will oppose every good intention, and everything you do will be as nothing to him.
If you decide to make him a meal, he will find something to complain about; it is either too salty, too hot, too cold, too hard, or even not tasty.
Watch it; he is disgusted by you.
6. He Will Intentionally Shut You Out
He will live without you and do things as though he is single.
You will be oblivious to the moves he is making in his life and career, and when you ask him about anything, he will shut you out.
He will withdraw your access to his life and decisions.
Even when he is at home, he will stay far away from you, making it feel as if you are now strangers.
7. He May Be Verbally and Physically Abusive
He might vocalize his feelings by tearing you down with his words at the slightest opportunity.
He will find fault in everything you do and never compliment anything you do.
Every time you try to talk to him, he will always be on the offensive, and every conversation will turn sour.
Soon enough, the fights and angry outbursts may gravitate to slaps, punches, and domestic abuse.
8. He Will Blame You for Everything
He will never take ownership of his mistakes or negative actions.
Instead, he will do everything in his power to portray himself as the victim and blame you for anything that goes wrong.
You may be put in a situation where you are being unfairly accused of causing all the problems, which makes you feel emotionally drained.
He may also try to use your own vulnerabilities against you, such as making comments about your physical appearance or belittling your accomplishments.
Coming to terms with these signs is heartbreaking, but if this is your reality, it is a step in the right direction and way better than living a lie.
Now that you have identified the signs, what can you do to remedy the situation?
Here are some points to note:
1. Sincerely Evaluate the Situation
It hurts the most to tell ourselves the truth, but most times, it is the most therapeutic thing to do.
Acknowledge that he is disgusted by you.
This doesn’t have to be directly your fault too, so give yourself some grace.
2. Have a Conversation with Him
In the case where he suddenly changed from being a doting partner to a resentful one, approach him to know why.
He may be bitter about something or be dealing with unhealed trauma.
In any case, his response here will determine a lot of things.
3. Explore Counselling
He may need to personally seek therapy.
Therapy will help him personally to heal from whatever he is dealing with.
You also need to explore couple counseling to help mend the fences.
A professional counselor will guide you both through the issues and encourage you both to work out your differences.
This might just be the turnaround point for your relationship.
4. Make an Effort to Reconnect
It’s time to put yourself out there.
Make an effort to try and reconnect with him.
Show him that you care about him and are willing to look past any hurt that may have been caused by the sudden change of behavior.
Focus on building on the positive aspects of your relationship and show appreciation for each other.
It may take a bit of time, but eventually, you both should be able to move on from the past and find your way back to each other, if he’s willing to save your marriage.
5. Don’t Let Your Self-Esteem Suffer
I know it’s hard, but try not to let the situation affect your self-esteem.
Positive affirmations can help a lot in this regard.
Remind yourself that you are worthy of love and that you have a great deal to offer your partner.
Focus on all the good qualities about yourself and remind yourself that you deserve to be treated with respect.
6. Decide on the Future of the Relationship
Finally, after exhausting all options to resolve things, you may need to objectively weigh and decide the future of your relationship; after all, “two cannot walk together except they agree.”