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Being showered with love and affection is the desire of every woman.

It makes you feel on top of the world.

A guy who loves you will express his love in every possible way, which also involves being protective of you.

However, some guys are very controlling.

They want to control you and everything you do.

Sadly, you might not notice this trait on time, as it looks enjoyable at the beginning of the relationship, but it might become suffocating and annoying as time goes by.

Narcissists are known to be control freaks.

They manipulate and control people into doing their bidding.

Usually, the first impression about them is that of “the kindest guy ever” until you start seeing that they are only doing all that to their advantage, and it is always about them and what they can get.

These are some of the signs of a controlling guy;


1. He wants to know everything you do

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Controlling men want you to live life on their terms; they always want to know what’s happening with you at every point in your life, and when you fail to defer to them, they don’t take it lightly.

When you wake up in the morning, you have to run your schedule by him, and if there’s a change in plan, you have to inform him in advance.

If he gets to know later, he will get angry that you didn’t let him know earlier.

While on the surface, this might seem like love and affection, this is far from the truth as this guy wants to be the chief controller of your life.

Why would another adult want to be in charge of your life? 

2. He stalks you

He becomes your “shadow.”

He monitors everything you do, the friends you speak with, your colleagues, and where you go.

He wants to know the names of your colleagues, and he even asks after them.

He knows everything about your schedule.

He could also go as far as checking your phones to know who you are talking with and your social media activities.

3. He chooses your friends

He tells you the friends he’s comfortable seeing you with and those he doesn’t want to see with you.

He explains why the friends he doesn’t want to see you with are bad influences.

He tries to poison your mind against those he considers unsuitable. 

4. He makes decisions for you

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He always knows what’s best for you at every point you want to make a decision, and he will ensure to manipulate you in following his lead.

If you have a job offer, he would want to be the one to decide whether to accept the offer or not.

He always wants to be the one to decide what you do.

He treats you like a baby who doesn’t know what’s best for her until someone makes decisions.

5. He makes himself the most important person in your life

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He often makes you feel that your life is worthless without him.

He projects himself as the most crucial person in your life and that he has a huge stake in how your life turns out.

He wants your every affair to revolve around him.

He tries to emotionally cut you off from your family members and friends as he doesn’t want them to have a say in your affairs.

He showers you with so much love and attention and makes you feel you can do well without any of your family members since you have him.

6. He ensures that you’re always the one at fault

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Controlling men are chief manipulators.

He always ensures to hold you responsible for his misbehaviors towards you.

When he has done something wrong and ought to apologize, he will do everything possible to hold you responsible for his actions, and you will end up apologizing.

He is never at fault, but you are always at fault.

If you have observed that your boyfriend is constantly turning the table against you whenever there’s a disagreement between you both, and while he’s clearly at fault but ensures to hold you responsible for his misbehavior, it’s an obvious sign that you are with a controlling guy.

7. He tries to guilt-trip or manipulate you

Whenever he wants something from you, he manipulates you to get his way, and if you refuse to give in to his demands, he makes you feel bad for your actions.

For example, if he wants to borrow some money from you and you are not willing to part with your money, he will start making statements like, “It’s not your fault; I was the one who made the mistake of coming to you. It’s just better to go and meet an outsider for help than come to my girlfriend”.

It’s a deliberate act to get you into giving him what he wants.

8. He wants to be the decision-maker in the relationship 

He always wants to call the shots in the relationship.

He wants to be the one to decide what is done per time.

He decides when and where to go for dates and who pays for stuff, and he gets upset when you try to put up a contrary opinion about his decisions.

He believes that as the man, he should be the one to have the final say, and you are always to follow his lead without questions.

9. He criticizes you


A controlling person has one aim: to always feel like the most important person.

If your boyfriend is one, he will always seize every opportunity to criticize or belittle you so that you can doubt yourself and your abilities and start relying on him for validation.

He always sees no good in you.

He might tell you he’s trying to challenge you to be a better version, but that is far from the truth.

He enjoys seeing you doubt yourself.

When you observe these signs in your boyfriend, it’s obvious he means no good for you, and you need to evaluate your values and make a wise decision to end such a terrible relationship.

You are a queen, and you deserve to be treated honorably.



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