12 Signs God Wants You To Leave a Relationship

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Kindly note:

1. ‘Relationship’ in this article refers to people who are dating, not married people. 

2. By God, I refer to the Christian God, so I support my points with the Bible. 



Are you struggling with whether or not you should break up with someone?

It’s an extremely difficult decision to make, but sometimes God gives us signs that we need to let go of someone.

Here are signs God wants you to leave a relationship:

12 Signs God Wants You To Leave a Relationship

1. They have a serious character flaw that makes it impossible for them to grow spiritually

If you’re dating someone and they just can’t seem to change, they may be stuck in the same patterns over and over again, e.g., lying without remorse, being selfish, laziness, cheating, etc.

If they’re not willing to change their behavior, then there’s no point in trying to change yourself or the relationship.

A person who is unwilling to grow spiritually is probably not going to change with time.

They have no desire to be better or different than they are, and this means that you cannot grow together with them.

If your partner is unwilling to work on their character flaws and make changes in their life, then it’s time to step away from the relationship so that you can focus on healing yourself and growing spiritually.

God will not want you to be with someone who brings you down spiritually.

Don’t even try to say you can change them.

No one can change anyone.

Only God can.

And God Himself can’t help someone who isn’t ready to accept His help.

So, this is beyond you.

Another reason God would want you to be away from this person is that they might influence you, and you’ll learn their ways. 

“Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”
I Corinthians 15:33 NKJV

” Make no friendship with an angry man, And with a furious man do not go, Lest you learn his ways And set a snare for your soul.”

Proverbs 22:24‭-‬25 NKJV


2. They have an addiction problem

Signs God Wants You To Leave a Relationship

They have an addiction that hurts them and/or the people around them, and they don’t want anything to do with change or accountability.

If they can’t stop drinking or smoking marijuana or doing drugs, then they probably never will — which means their addiction will worsen over time instead of improving.

This also includes being addicted to pornography or gambling.

You will end up being miserable with someone who doesn’t want to get help to overcome their addiction, and God doesn’t want you to be miserable.

The Bible talks a lot about self-control. 

“All things are lawful for me, but all things are not helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.” 

I Corinthians 6:12 NKJV

This is just one of the many verses that encourages us to let nothing control us. 


3. They are emotionally manipulative and abusive (This includes verbal abuse)

Signs You Are Dating a Narcissist

Emotional manipulation is one of the worst things in a relationship.

It’s emotional abuse, plain and simple.

Emotional abusers are often charming and charismatic at first, but as soon as they have you hooked, they start controlling you with fear, guilt, and shame.

If someone has manipulated you or made you feel guilty or ashamed during your relationship so far — whether by yelling at you or using subtle emotional tactics — then this person has already shown you what they are capable of doing once they get married to you.

God loves you and doesn’t want you to be in this kind of bondage.


4. Your relationship isn’t just working

Signs You Are Dating a Narcissist

You’ve tried everything possible, but nothing works, and your relationship won’t improve no matter what you do (not even counseling).

Maybe there’s a fundamental incompatibility between the two of you that can never be fixed by counseling or getting to know each other better.

For example, you have different values and want different things in life.

Maybe they don’t believe in God or marriage and having kids, and you want those.

This kind of relationship isn’t going anywhere.


5. You don’t love each other anymore

If you’re staying together for any reason other than love, it’s time to let go.

You can still care about someone without being in love or having romantic feelings toward them.

You can still care about their well-being and want them to be happy in their life even if they aren’t a part of yours anymore.

God does not want you to be in a loveless relationship or marriage.


6. You fight more than you agree

Signs God Wants You To Leave a Relationship

You constantly fight or argue with each other over small things instead of working through them together as a team.

Arguing and fighting over petty issues is never healthy.

When conflict arises between two people who love each other deeply, they should be able to resolve it without having to resort to arguing constantly or being rude towards one another.

If this isn’t your case, God might be telling you that you and your partner aren’t on the same page.

And how can you work and walk together if you don’t agree?

“Can two walk together, unless they are agreed?” 

Amos 3:3 NKJV


7. You don’t feel like yourself around them

Many people have a hard time being themselves when they are in a relationship.

They change their behavior and alter their interests and even their physical appearance to please their partner.

When you don’t feel like yourself, it’s a sign that you’re giving up some part of who you are to be with someone who doesn’t appreciate or encourage your best self.

So if you have to pretend to be someone else with the person you’re dating, it’s a sign the person isn’t the one from God for you.


8. They take advantage of your kindness

If they constantly ask for money or favors from you but never return them, they take advantage of your kindness and use you for money. 

This is a sign that your relationship is one-sided and you’re just being used.

God will never want you to be in a relationship with someone who is just using you for money or your body.


9. They have no desire for spiritual growth

If your partner is not growing in their faith or showing an interest in doing so, this is a huge red flag.

When it comes to relationships, there has to be some level of spiritual compatibility.

If they aren’t interested in walking with God, and you are, you’ll be unequally yoked. 

Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?

II Corinthians 6:14‭-‬15 NKJV


10. They bring you down spiritually

If you’re dating someone pulling you down spiritually — because they are a “bad influence” on you, they’re a bad match.

God wants you to be with someone who will help you grow in your faith, not someone who will drag you down.

So if your boyfriend or girlfriend always talks about how much they hate church and pressure you to do things against your beliefs, values, and morals, God doesn’t want you to be with them.

A relationship where you have to compromise your values isn’t a God-ordained one.


11. You know, deep down in you

Deep down, you know they aren’t the one for you, but you can’t bring yourself to leave them because you don’t want to hurt them or lose their friendship.

You might be afraid to end things because of how much time has passed or how long they’ve been in your life.

And while those are valid concerns, they don’t outweigh the fact that this relationship isn’t working for either of you.


12. Your family, friends, and spiritual leaders warn you

Your family, friends, and spiritual leaders are all resources that God uses to help us make the right decisions in our lives.

When they warn you about your relationship, they care about you and want what’s best for you.

Sometimes God may want us to break up with someone, but not because we don’t love them anymore.

It could be because they are no longer a blessing in our life, or it could even be because they are a hindrance in our life.

If you have done everything possible to make the relationship work, and if you’ve prayed about it and asked for guidance from the Lord, then you should not feel guilty about ending the relationship if that is what God is leading you to do.

Signs God Wants You To Leave a Relationship


43 thoughts on “12 Signs God Wants You To Leave a Relationship”

    • Excellent,I was in a toxic relationship I am a staunch Christian and only to find out he was serving other God.
      This article healed me.Thanks be to God.

        • Don’t be tired of people ooh, they’re part of yr assets, though some may cause u some irritations; u still need people to fulfil your assignment.
          Remember, u’re not sent to everybody, not even Christ’s word was understood or accepted by all, so do yr prt & leave it to nature 4 who’ll rcv it or not.
          Yr writing was a good piece for those it’s meant to address, if they’ll take it though. More graces & blessing

    • i don’t believe that because sometimes people get married with out realizing they shouldn’t and marriage shouldn’t be a bond to keep you in a loveless or abusive relationship. God doesn’t want us to hurt married or not

    • It said in the first paragraph this article wasn’t for married people. Which part was nonsense, the part about abuse or the part about them not willing to grow?

    • Wow exactly what I’m going through at this very moment in my life.I prayed to God for 17 years to God to change the man I love so much doing drugs because I couldn’t live without him I believe and have so much faith in God that His going to change but today I got answers . Everything I went through is what I read here, today was a sign from God that I must let go😭 Please pray for me🙏

  1. i see the prejudice in saying relationship meaning dating not married. what do you then advice people who were deceived into marrying only to see all the above mentioned as the patners character? what God has joined together means what God joined…so do we think God is the joiner of all marriages we see? the answer is No…..

  2. It’s pretty irresponsible to say that if you’re married, it’s ok to stay with someone who exhibits these traits. Yes, marriage is a covenant. But it’s not a prison sentence.

  3. I’ve spotted 3 major things that are happening in my current relationship, that you’ve mentioned and honestly I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to leave him at all because his a great partner when it comes to other things. So I have a question. Is it possible for God to cause something to happen that will actually cause you to breakup if his/she really is not the one for you??
    Because I really don’t think I’d be able to do break up with him🥺

    • God doesn’t necessarily cause things that will make you end a relationship, but He can open your eyes to things you may otherwise ignore.

      God respects our choice, and if you think you can never break up with someone despite the warning signals you see, even God cannot help you.

      Knowing yourself and what is good for you will help you make the right decision.

      If you say he’s a good partner, then I wonder the three things that make you want to break up with him.

  4. Hi. I really like this. But i would like to know if i am not marries but i have kids with him. What to do then?
    It is more easy to leave someone without having children.

  5. you know who they are before marriage. that is what dating is. Some people change. Some don’t. remember, you can’t change everyone. you hope they have the tools to use going forward with their next relationship.

  6. God bless you. May God Bless the author of this article. this felt like God talking to me. divinely inspired. if our dating partner gets a 12/12 can we go ahead for marriage? if our partner gets a 10/12 what do we do? thank you as I hope to read back from you.

  7. Amen I am glad you said this, my husband is a porn addicted, selfscenterd , emotionally abusive, malignant liar who preaches in church, and I am miserable to the point of it affecting my health. he would
    emotionally abuse me and when I refuse his sexual advances because he wouldn’t wash himself properly causing me to have terrible bladder infections to the point where I passed blood, he would run to the pastor and tell him that I wasn’t doing my wifely duties, and also telling the pastor not to say anything to me, but thank God the pastor came to me and I was able to tell him all the mean things he did to me.


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